Nevada County Picayune and Gurdon Times Newspaper Archive

Into The Void with John Miller

The Hardest Decision Ever

Come in, sit down, shut up, get your pencils and paper ready. Take notes kiddies because the School of Hard Knocks is open for business and there will be a test later.

Recently Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee lauded the General Assembly for passing a bill requiring those seeking abortions to be given alternatives to this.

Personally, I don't think this is a good idea. First, those having to make the decision to terminate a pregnancy don't usually do it on a whim. In Arkansas abortion is not just another means of birth control. For this you'd have to go to Russia, where at one time it was the preferred method of birth control.

Please indulge me and allow me to open a small window of my own past and experience in this venue.

Shortly before Christmas in 1994 I lost my job as an office supply salesman. In January 1995 my now ex-wife got pregnant and began having severe health problems. It didn't help that she is diabetic.

Our doctor at the time, advised us what to do. We did as told, but she also lost her job as typesetter with a printing company because of missing so much work due to her health problems.

She was in constant agony and nothing seemed to work. It reached the point we were given no choice but to terminate the pregnancy. The options were simple, either the fetus be removed, or both she and the baby died. Save one or lose two. This is the decision we had to make. There really wasn't a decision, but going through with the abortion still wasn't easy for us.

After it was done and we switched doctors, we found out the problem wasn't related to her diabetes and the pregnancy, but something else entirely. There was the possibility the pregnancy could have gone full term, but no guarantees either she or the baby would have survived anyway.

This was part of the beginning of the end of our marriage. Neither of us knew how to talk to the other about it, and we still don't.

On my part it's a pain carried around every minute of every day. You see, the doctors at the clinic told us the fetus was big for six weeks, and healthy. There was nothing wrong with it.

Still, the decision had to be made  save one, lose two. I don't regret the choice we made, because I loved my wife at the time and wanted her with me. We are still good friends, though she has remarried and moved out of state.

Hopefully this is a decision I'll never have to face again. I feel for those who will, because it's the hardest thing they'll ever have to decide in their lives.

Those going to abortion clinics don't need to be vilified by the pro-lifers who base their protesting and the murders of doctors on religious beliefs. What they're going through is hard enough without the hatred of others.

I do have one question for the pro-lifers, though  How many unwanted children have you adopted recently?