Nevada County Picayune and Gurdon Times Newspaper Archive

Into The Void

The Myth Of Y2K

For the past year or so about all the media has been whining about is the Y2K bug.

Speculation has run the gamut from complete economic collapse with all human needs being unavailable to Armageddon.

Frankly, neither will occur.

My friends, there is very little cause for concern where the year 2000 is concerned. Personally, it would be of no surprise if the entire Y2K situation is nothing more than a way for some fat cats to make more bucks by scaring the public yet again.

The nation's financial institutions have been working to get their computer hardware and software Y2K ready for about two years.

The FDIC stuck its nose in early and required all banks have their systems checked, upgraded, then checked again.

So anyone planning to take their money out of the bank and hide it in the backyard in a Mason fruit jar should think twice before doing it.

First, burying money isn't safe. A child could find the jar while playing, or some unscrupulous person may learn of the treasure trove and steal it.

Money left in banks will be perfectly safe and federally insured as it is now.

For those still worried about banks, hang onto the November bank statement. It will have the final record of the year about your accounts.

Now, as far as the world ending on Jan. 1, 2000, don't lose any sleep over it.

While I'm no biblical scholar, I do seem to recall a passage stating no one except God himself has this date pencilled in his day planner.

Even his Son doesn't have this piece of information available on his database.

And, if the world does by chance end then, there's not much we can do about it anyway.

Anyone worried about Armageddon occurring Jan. 1, 2000, though, should be making final preparations for their eternity now and living a much better quality of life.

There have been stories about people hoarding supplies of bottled water and canned goods.

This is a reminder from the Cold War during the 1950s when people had bomb shelters built in their backyards to keep them safe when the Russians dropped the big one.

Now, those shelters make great playhouses for children and even better cellars for storms and what not.

All hoarding water and canned goods is doing for those involved is depleting their supply of ready cash and liquid assets should a real emergency occur.

Utility companies have also worked to get ready for Y2K.

Entergy has spent millions on upgrading and testing its equipment for the coming of next year. (The actual millennium won't be here until Jan. 1, 2001. After all when BC became AD, the first year was not 0, but was year 1.)

Phone companies have done the same, while gas companies, such as Reliant Arkla, have few computerized parts. In fact, most of Arkla's computers are used for accounting purposes as all of the works supplying gas to the public are mechanical in nature.

Area law enforcement agencies have also had their computers checked and upgraded as necessary for Y2K.

So, any of you planning on trying to get away with anything on Jan. 1 should think again as the National Crime Information Center and the Arkansas Crime Information Center systems will be up and running.

However, there could be some minor inconveniences at midnight Dec. 31, 1999, but nothing to panic over.

While the major problems of banking, communication and utilities have been addressed, little is known about what local businesses and their suppliers have done to prepare for Jan. 1, 2000.

Convenience store cash registers and gas pumps may not work if they haven't been upgraded, and this could be a headache.

The same can be said for the local grocery store. It's computerized registers may glitch out and not recognize bar codes. After all bar codes didn't exist on Jan. 1, 1900, which is where many computer calendars will revert if they have not been made Y2K compliant.

It would be a good idea to stock up with groceries and fill the gas tank on Dec. 31, just in case, but there's no need to go overboard.

So, change no plans as far as ushering in Jan. 1, 2000, because this is the only time we'll get the chance to do so.

Partiers need to remember moderation as a key because there will be plenty of cops on the streets ready to write DWI and DUI tickets, and, folks, these babies ain't cheap in any way.

Now, go out, plan your parties well, invite your friends and don't worry about anything but the hangover which will likely appear as your Y2K gift.